BOOKS & BEER FOR SHIELD & SWORD

May 17th 2011, 12:13 by E O Hatterpol | 205 AU FROM SUN

"What was that?" I shouted, grabbing on to the bookstacks.  "We're moving!"


"It's those men.  The Flybrary is in danger.  Let's go the bow - NOW!" Ravisius shouted.


"Hang on just a tick!"


I ran off into the shadows.  I knew exactly what I was looking for.


When I came back, I had a copy of M Vaurillon's On the Serving of Mustard After Meals, fourteen volumes.  It was the same book that I dropped in fright two weeks earlier; the sound of it had scared Ravisius away.  It was big, thick & sturdy, with a tough leather belt around its waist.


Ravisius gave me a funny look.


"What?  Not all of us are made of books.  I've got to arm myself!"


I held the thick book to my chest and took a few blows from Ravisius to test its viability as a makeshift shield.  He was much more powerful than he looked.


I took a few swipes at him with my broken beer bottle, too, just to get the feel for it.


"Check this out," I said.  "Picked this one up in case I'm ever surrounded by pirates."


I took a wide stance and held the jagged bottle behind me.  I made whirring energy sound effects as if I were charging up an attack.  And then-


"Kee-yaaaaaaaaaaaah, suckas!"


I whirled around in a devastating spin attack.  Ravisius didn't say anything.


"Yeah!" I yipped.  "There'd be pirate guts all o'er the floor right now, definitely."


"Ready to get to the bow?" he asked.


"Let's do it!  You salty jokers better BRACE yo'selves, huzz-"


"Shhh!  There's someone coming!" Ravisius hissed.


I stopped talking and listened.  Sure enough, I heard footsteps.


A pirate had come back to see us - but we were ready for him now.